Are We Bashing or Blessing?

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I have been really heart broken and almost grieving these last couple of months, but the Lord has comforted me in the way that only He can. He always does – He just surprises me every time this is needed in my own life because He is still full of surprises as to how He goes about it. God is so AMAZING!

You see… My Father allows some grief to enter in at times SO THAT I will actually go to Him in prayer over all of it. Deep prayer – not the kind you do here and there. On my knees, kind of prayer!

He allows such things to get me thinking – and seeking – to go deep with Him. He causes me to wake me up in places where I have started to doze off, and maybe didn’t even realize it. He heightens my awareness that other stuff IS GOING ON that we don’t always pay attention to, or that we push down and try our best to ignore.

Guilty as charged.

But when that nagging is there, as a follower after Christ, you know that you need to address it. It won’t stop until you do. And that is what has been happening to me.

This actually has happened before – but these last few months it has gotten really, REALLY strong. You see – most people don’t realize this, but I am a very observant human. I watch things people talk about and I actually actively pay attention to  how they are being received or how others are responding as well.

I can see all sides of things and I can see where misunderstandings occur too. It’s tempting in those situations to tell those that I love to “play it safe” and just stop sharing altogether – so as to avoid conflict and save them some pain, right? But God has us all going through our own process that He’s taking us through – sometimes we make errors, but we learn from them as we seek Him. Sometimes, others attack us too, and we want to avoid that stuff all-the-more.

Have I ever told you that I am the master of wanting to squash conflict before it even starts? Hmmmmmmmmm.

The stuff that’s been grieving me lately has to do with what I see happening among believers regarding what is going on in the world and what scripture tells us clearly about God’s plan for this earth – that the way it is now will not last forever – and He has had a plan from the very beginning for all of that – for all of us.

I’m talking about our Blessed Hope (for those of us who follow after Jesus Christ) – and, depending on where you’re at and how you view things, what is sometimes also called the “end of days” or “end times.” My own studies have caused me to look at it more as our Blessed Hope – but it took a long time to get there.

About 8 years ago, the Lord really pressed it on my heart to truly study – to go DEEP – and learn about why part of the “end of days” in reality, as a Christian, is not scary – because it contains our Blessed Hope. He had me start off with Revelation – a book I was always afraid to study – and then move on to other parts of the Word that talk about prophecy – over 1/4 of the bible is about prophecy – so it’s kinda important, yo.

In the beginning of the book of Revelation, we are told:

Blessed is the one who reads aloud the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it, because the time is near. Revelation 1: 3

That is huge, man. I always wondered what makes up this special blessing when the book of Revelation is not about only lovely things. But once I really dug deep and looked at the other prophetic scriptures, I saw. (Hint- there’s more than one special blessing – that’s just what I think now).

One of the special blessings I received was that God took away my fear – although at times I still feel unsettled, because I literally feel like the rubber band of this world has almost stretched to capacity, and I can feel it about to snap, I don’t fear it for myself or my family. I do still grieve deeply for those who will have to go through some of the stuff that’s coming up – make no mistake about it. But the focus being on our Blessed Hope as Believers totally overrides that now. Isn’t that where the focus always was supposed to be on in relation to God’s prophecies? On His promises, and drawing closer in our walk with Him? I just never understood why it wasn’t until I went deep.

God actually placed an overriding and utterly joyous expectation into my own heart for the possibility that Christ MAY return for His church (rapture) in my lifetime. And if he doesn’t? It doesn’t matter – because I am saved and I WILL live with Him – my Savior – for all eternity. He also has caused me to want to shine His light all the brighter to those who may not yet know Him. That’s pretty important too!

But what DOES matter, is that I live my life LOOKING FOR His return and never losing hope. I also realize He is with me right here and right now, lest you were wondering.

So, why have I been grieving? Why am I so unsettled?

Well, for starters, I have seen so much dissension in the church over this matter. I’ve come to expect such things in the world, but seeing it in the body of Christ is another thing – it actually HURTS MY STINKIN’ HEART!

It’s always been there – I get that. But it seems like now, it is really bad. There are those who want to actively watch and look for Christ’s return rather than go through their days thinking “oh well, if He comes back, great, and if not, great.” They are excited – they want everyone else to actively watch as well and feel a special blessing because of that in their own lives. There are those who are called to watch and sound the alarm and “speak this prophecy aloud” and those who are called to other things in the body of Christ at this time. We are all part of the same body – we are called to different things at different times. It all matters!

But I have seen a REAL opposition lately toward those who wish to speak about prophecy aloud – in a big way. I also see us taking an either/or approach to things – and that is missing the mark, if you ask me – it is a trap laid by the devil  himself.

I get it – a lot of it is because there have been folks in the past who were “date setters” and deceiving people. But if you really study that – most of them weren’t looking to the WHOLE of scripture and reading it in FULL context to make their case. MOST of them.

And people are fallible…that’s just the crux of the matter. But to not even want to ENTERTAIN the thought of Christ’s soon return is flat-out stifling.

On the other side of the coin, there are those who use scare tactics and forget about the love and the hope part (the most important part of our Blessed Hope) when they talk about such things. I  have been guilty of that in the past, I know. I’ve also been guilty of ignoring prophecy and talking about it out loud with others because of fear that others would judge me, be scared, think this or that of me. Neither of those two things is right.

The point is – all of the Word of God matters. All of what He admonishes us to do and how to behave matters. Truth matters. Love matters. Looking for our Blessed Hope matters. STILL ministering to and loving others as we love ourselves while looking for Christ’s return matters. Not being asleep, but being awake in regard to what God says will happen matters. Actively watching matters. Realizing others may not have studied or understand matters. Understanding fellow believers may have unsaved family members in their lives and that’s why all of this makes them uncomfortable matters. Speaking up and sounding alarms matter (if truly rooted in scripture). Speaking the TRUTH IN LOVE matters.

But what matters most is our relationship with God first, and loving others as ourselves right next in line. Sometimes, love isn’t all flowers and hearts, I get it. But we MUST remember to love one another all the more as “we see the day drawing near.”

I go back to what I have always said –

It’s not Either/Or…..

It’s Both/And!!!!!!!!!

Paul speaks here to believers at the time and this applies to us now: I highly recommend reading ALL of it, not just the first verse or two.

 But concerning the times and the seasons, brethren, you have no need that I should write to you.  For you yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so comes as a thief in the night.  For when they say, “Peace and safety!” then sudden destruction comes upon them, as labor pains upon a pregnant woman. And they shall not escape.  But you, brethren, are not in darkness, so that this Day should overtake you as a thief.  You are all sons of light and sons of the day. We are not of the night nor of darkness.  Therefore let us not sleep, as others do, but let us watch and be sober.  For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk are drunk at night.  But let us who are of the day be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet the hope of salvation.  For God did not appoint us to wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, that whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with Him. Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5-11

If you read this as well as MANY other parts of scripture that talk about Christ’s return and His plan for us as believers, it starts to become quite clear that we don’t have to be surprised about when He will come back for us – that if we are truly studying the Word and going deep, we will know the season. But we don’t want to get so caught up in looking for the particular day or hour that we forget to love one another in the process. It’s not wrong to look and watch as Christ Himself exhorts us to! But all the others stuff as to how He would have us live while we wait is important too.

Yep. It’s Both/And.

I could go off on another tangent here about “no one knows the day or hour” and how that gets thrown around so casually but I won’t. Let me just urge you to TRULY go and study that entire section of scripture and harmonize it with all the other prophetic passages throughout the Word and see for yourself that “the day or hour” is really not speaking about the rapture, but when the heavens and earth will melt away (that’s at the end of the millenium, in case you don’t know that yet).

I’m not here to “make a case” for Christians to look at prophecy and how much or how little you want to speak about it the same way. I’m here to admonish all of us – MYSELF INCLUDED – to take these things seriously and to look at the WORD of God to interpret itself.

I’m here today to share what is grieving my heart and that I feel it is SO IMPORTANT that we pray for one another, share the love and truth of Christ with each other as well as those who do not believe, and never simply dismiss one another’s point of view – but look to the Word and to Christ.

But most importantly – we have to LOOK UP. And at the same time, we can’t forget to look side-to-side at one another. All of this – well, it should be causing us to draw even closer to our Lord and Savior and one another. If it isn’t – don’t blame prophecy, man. Look inward and ask the Lord to show you where the darkness lies in your own heart. This is what I have to do on a daily basis. My tendency is to simply cut and run and avoid the subject entirely, rather than looking at my own heart and what the Lord is trying to show me about myself and how maybe, just maybe – He wants to change me.

We are in this thing together, even though the enemy tries to tear us apart. I would never want to EVER steal someone’s zeal and desire to actively look for the Blessed Hope of Christ’s return. NEVER! It grieves me in ways I cannot express when I see others do that (even well-meaning folks).

At the same time, I don’t want to EVER forget that not everyone is in the same place with how they approach their own study of God’s Prophetic Word – and we all need to show grace, love and understanding, because EVEN WHEN we are not in the same place, we are, as believers, IN THIS TOGETHER.

So instead of continuing to grieve silently, I decided to write this today – to any of my fellow believers out there who so choose to read it. You don’t have to agree with me – and I’d appreciate all commenting to be of a nature of building one another up – if you DO wish to talk with me privately about your take on prophetic scripture, please feel free to place your email in the comments and we can do so. But if the desire to debate prophecy is the first thing you think of as you read this, then that should be a good indicator that you missed my point entirely. I’m here to discuss such things with any brother and sister who wants to – but that’s not really the point of this story today.

I am not a prophecy teacher. (Buah ha ha!) I am not an expert. (even funnier!)

But I am in love with Jesus Christ.

I look to the SCRIPTURES of God to discern what He is saying to us about all of this. I take it seriously – and it actually causes me to let loose of the few earthly ties that bind me here and look forward to my life with HIM once I am removed from this earth (another blessing?) It didn’t used to be that way before I studied what I had always feared. (ANOTHER blessing!)

Yes-  God made true (again) on His promise that it would be a blessing to my life to seek Him in this way as well. And I am POSITIVE that He will make true on EVERY LAST ONE of His other promises.

Talk about grace upon grace. Wow.

Most importantly, I am saved. That – salvation through Jesus Christ – matters more than anything else. Drawing others to thing about Him too, so He can then work within them and they can become saved too – that matters as well. And I pray every single day that I can share the light, love and truth of Jesus with everyone in my path in ways that cause others to let Him pierce their own hearts. I want EVERYONE to get to live with us for all eternity with Jesus – it grieves me that not everyone will.

Let’s share the good news of Jesus rather than fight against one another. Let us not be afraid to respectfully question other believers and seek to understand them and our Savior all the more. Let us not be intent on winning a debate, rather, stand for Him and His truth AND love one another even when we disagree. But let us also allow others who want to shout from the rooftops about our blessed  hope to do so – in a respectful manner, of course.

Let us see our Blessed Hope as a blessing, rather than Bashing it. Let us not bash one another over the head with any of this, rather edify one another. We are all mere humans who all are going through different experiences in our earthly lives – let us look up to the only One who truly understands all of it.

That’s what Jesus does. And we do well to follow after His example.

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What People Living With Chronic Illnesses Think But are Sometimes Afraid To Say

 

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I’ve only lived with Fibromyalgia for just over three years now – at least, with the diagnosis of it. I will say one thing about that ~ knowing what had been ailing me for a lot longer than just the past three years did help. It helped to know I wasn’t crazy (totally) and just imagining it. But it had been lurking there – right under the surface – for a lot of years. It also is probably a BIG PART of the other stuff I have contended with in life – we just didn’t know what to attribute it all to before the diagnosis.

What did rear its ugly head early on in my life, however, has been depression and anxiety. Chronic. Life long. And I don’t like to talk about it sometimes, but it’s the truth and I have to be honest with you. I’ve lived with my own sort of depression (and anxiety)- mostly chemically/hormonally/biologically driven – for the better part of my life. I am fifty years old, by the way.  That’s a long time. Don’t feel sorry for me about it – there’s a point to this story that’s about something much bigger than that.

I know it for what it is – I no longer buy into the stuff that others, including myself used to tell me about that second part of things. I will say it over and over again until the day that I die – when it comes to depression or anxiety, there are two MAIN kinds. The kind that is about perspective, attitude, outlook, behaviors – (semi-controllable with life changes) and the kind that is chemically driven (not so much controllable). I have both, but mostly the second kind is what takes me over sometimes. Yes. The two can co-exist. Yes – it’s hard for those around us to see which one you can do something about and which one is beyond your control.

It’s the same way with Fibro and the way it manifests itself (mostly invisibly) in your life.

I’ve learned one thing throughout all of this – but it doesn’t mean that I’ve perfected living it out. Feeling like we have to hide it from the world is still VERY PERVASIVE in our society. And I get that. I do. It sucks, but I understand it. It’s all about not being able to understand something if  you don’t go through it yourself. We are only human.

So, here is a PARTIAL list of things that I suspect most people who are struggling with chronic illness, chronic pain, chronic depression or anxiety or a host of other chronic things that make them “different” than who they really are inside, would like to say.

I share this with the heart of letting you know, that although there are some of us that do not feel this way, many of those I have met that struggle with things like this DO feel this way. We may tell those in our near and dear circle these things, but often we don’t feel that you truly believe us. More often, you hear us, but it just doesn’t STICK, because life clutters stuff up, man. And we are SO BUSY managing our chronic-whatever, (IT’S A FULL TIME JOB), that things like this – things that need to be said over and over and over again in order to stick, well – they get lost.

So, here we go:

Most of us realize that life is not all about us. Most of us deal with a lot of guilt when we think about how much worse things could be and we find ourselves crying in our Cheerios about our own situation.

Most of us feel selfish for having to focus so dang much on ourselves. Yet, we don’t know what to do, because we HAVE TO think about our situation so much – especially if we have chronic pain. There’s no where to run and little distraction from something like that. At least, there’s none that is lasting for much longer than a small stretch at a time.

Most of us were not always this way – it may have always “been there”, but we used to be able to do more things, have more good days than bad, and be more focused on others. Our whole lives didn’t used to always revolve around our illness and managing it. You probably remember that too.

Most of us still remember what it was like before. And we are in the cycle of grief. We know that you are too.

Most of us know this is hard on you. We know that we know that we know. And we feel responsible, even though it’s not “our fault.”

Most of us know that you have your own problems – some of them big ones- too. We want to be there for you. We want you to know that we get it – that you matter to us.

Most of us feel we are alone to a certain extent. Even when you help us – even when we pray. We KNOW we are not alone, but we FEEL alone. A lot.

Most of us realize there is a fine and messy line between knowing when it’s time to fight and when it’s about growing in surrender. That is very hard to discern. Why wouldn’t it be even HARDER for YOU to discern when you aren’t living in this skin? We get that.

Most of us feel pressure to act/deal with/look at things the way that those closest to them would want for them to. We try to look up, but sometimes, we just can’t. Then we feel like we have let you down. Again.

Most of us know that you are doing the best that YOU can in the face of this. We actually appreciate all the grace you extend to us, but feel bad about it all at the same time. It’s easy to say “it’s okay” but sometimes, we can’t help but think we are nothing but a pain in your butt. It’s part of the deal, man. We need lots of reassurance.

Most of us still find ourselves just wanting to be understood and to be sure you know we understand you as best we can. We also realize that part of surrender is giving that all up. That is H-A-R-D.

Most of us would snap our fingers and move this out of our lives (and out of YOUR life) in a hot second if we could.

Most of us want to do more for you and have the center of our lives be ANYTHING other than managing this junk. We are sick of ourselves. And that makes us even more sick. Dig it, man.

Most of us feel lost, even when we press in to God. We are reeling, spinning, and doing our best to try or not try – depending upon where we are at. We aren’t comfortable living in our own skin – but we keep trying to keep perspective in the midst of the fog of it all. For us, for you. For everybody’s sake.

Most of us feel all the same pressures as “normal” people have, along with knowing we must dedicate a lot of hours to managing this crap – we feel like failures and losers, even when we know it isn’t true. We know we are not martyrs, and that there are starving children digging through dumpsters in the world. We don’t want to try to explain our illness and situation to you in order to make you feel we are “one-upping” your problems- rather, we find ourselves desiring SO DEEPLY to help you understand. Not just for our sakes, but for YOURS.

Most of us finally shut down and stop sharing our feelings because when we see that it can’t be understood and it doesn’t help much to explain, that’s what we feel we need  to do for everyone’s sake.

Most of us know it’s more about surrender than fighting. You can’t know that until you are living in our shoes. You just can’t. It may look like we are giving up, when we are “practicing” surrender. It’s a process, yo. We don’t know how to do it any better than the next guy would.

Most of us try 99 percent of the time to keep perspective and look at the upside. But we have days where we can’t see straight, even when we turn our eyes upward. We know it hurts you when we share with you on those dark days – and yet….we feel we need to speak to someone who loves us about all of it.

Most of us would give anything to jog again, have a clear head again, and be able to hold a convo with you that’s all about YOU and NOTHING about our illness.

Most of us know that our identity SHOULD NOT be defined by our illness, but that so much of our lives are spent managing it, that gets murky and muddy too.

Most of us know you miss the old us. Newsflash: We do too.

Finally, most of us know that the world does not revolve around us, and that this completely sucks for everyone involved in our lives. But we have to hang on to the fact that God has a purpose in everything – that He is teaching not only us through this ugly hot mess, but that He may be trying to teach others in our circle a few hard truths  as well.

We often laugh at ourselves, because in some ways, we feel like test subjects. We are reminded thousands of times a day of what failure looks like, and we have to WORK HARD to keep that in perspective and realize that what looks like failure (not being able to have any stamina, having to lay in our bed to protect our bodies and minds so that we can be productive for the 6  hours a day that we can, saying too much when we are in a very dark and unreasonable place mentally, crossing the line between managing our chronic condition and letting it define us and take us over), is just topical.

It’s what is inside our hearts that matters. Truly. It isn’t what impacts the world around us right away – all the junk likes to take on that role. But it IS what truly matters.

So, if you live with someone or around someone who struggles in these ways, please know that as much as we can, we get it. We don’t want to be a burden to you. But MOST OF US are fighting against completely shutting down to “protect” you.

Most of us want to be real with you, yet let you know that we are okay.

Most of us know that you miss us. That’s not lost on us. But please know, that although this has changed us on the outside into something that can seem MONSTROUS and UGLY the vast majority of the time – if you look a little deeper, you just may find that the inside is being transformed into something of beauty.

And we want to share THAT with you too. You see – we get to understand something now (so do you) and use that for the glory of God!

So I will leave you with this verse. If you ever feel lost, not sure what to do with your chronic friend or family member – not knowing whether you are helping or not…remember this one thing, if nothing else. It’s all worth it if we use this to comfort others in the name of Jesus.

It’s all worth it.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1: 3-4

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Come With Me ~ ALLIN

Friends,

I have been praying for some time, along with others, about other ways in which to use my love of bringing praise and honor to Jesus through writing. Meaningful ways. I love the community we have here – amongst one another.  That is not going away. No way, no how!

But his prayer has been about how God might wish for us to reach others in different ways, further enhancing community in Christ, but most of all it has been about how to help others in our world to draw even closer to Jesus and live their lives with their eyes set upon Him.

It is not going to replace what I do here. It is simply another place in which I get to shout out His name with praise and adoration. I have said no to many such offers in the past. This one? This one is going to be different ~ I can feel it when I pray about it. He told me to say yes. Maybe He is going to whisper that word in your own ear too.

ALLIN. Living ALLIN for Him.

It is not about platforms. It is not about “followers” (except for those who are following after Jesus Christ). It is not about “promoting” anything other than Jesus, our Lord and Savior.

My friend Heather has had a vision about how she might reach others for Christ in a deeper way. She has had this dream for many years, and much prayer has gone into this adventure for Christ. She didn’t know what it would look like, but she knew God would give her the green light when it was time to step and move forward.

It’s time.

So the time has come. Several prayed-over folks have been given the honor by God, through Heather, to be contributing authors for this new ministry and community. I so happen to be one of them and thought those who read my heart here just might be interested in being a part of this wonderful community.

You are all valued and special in the eyes of the Lord. Maybe you will find even more to celebrate about Him here too!

It’s time for us to jump in – together – ALL IN!

Below, you will find the details about this wonderful community and ministry. Join us, won’t you? We are growing it together – US – with JESUS – I see fruit in our future. Abundant fruit.

Lift off is TODAY!

Join us, dear friends. It will be different than other things you have seen. It is the Lord’s. It is ours as co-heirs with Christ.

It’s about community in Christ. It’s about praising Him, sharing Him, learning about what He writes to us in His Word.

It’s about living all in for Him – not toe-dipping. Not halfway.

It’s about authentic admission of where we fail, but simultaneously it’s about the victory we already have because of Christ Jesus.

Yes. It’s about blossoming in our love for Him ~ in our awe of Him.

It’s ALL of it!

Let’s go ALLIN for Him together. Details Below….

cropped-allin_logo_header_2Click Here to Join Us! http://goingallin.org/

Let’s live ALLIN for Him.

Let’s live, learn and love ~ together.